Friday, June 10, 2022

Mila White by Mila White

 Mila has been working hard this semester with her speech therapist on developing an 'all about me' presentation for her class.  She got to develop full sentences on an AAC/talker and prepare to present in front of her peers (although being the center of attention is not something my girly struggles with!) and be ready for spontaneous questions! 

There are a lot of things that I love about this video:

  • She was so pumped she started asking and answering her own questions!
  • She labeled YouTube as one of her favorite things; she literally doesn't watch YouTube--but I'm probably the only one who understands that she interprets all streaming options on our TV as being "youtube" (it's one of the first logos on the screen and I feel a desperate need to explain this to her teachers...who literally don't care)
  • She called out "Frozen Special" which is the Broadway production of Frozen that she saw live in Feb 2020.  I didn't know how to explain to her that she wasn't seeing the MOVIE Frozen, that this was a special event so it became Frozen Special *shrug* What are ya' gunna do?
  • This is the first time Mila has shared about being from Albania and moving to the US.  This is a big deal!  She hasn't wanted to talk about her previous life, and only recently started spontaneous sharing memories of life before summer 2018.  She stood there pretty darn proud of where she came from and where she is now <3 


Baby's first classroom presentation also checked off her 9th grade public speaking requirement. Check! Check!  She has come a LONG way!!



Sunday, May 29, 2022

Where is my brother?

Four years ago, we met in the courtyard of an orphanage across the world. One of the first questions she asked me was: ku eshte vellai im?    Where is my brother?   (In the video documentation of the day, I mistranslated the word vellai and asked her if she wanted to PLAY?  Then she gave me the first of many, many, many looks like I'm an idiot). 

She was raised with three 'sisters' the same age as she, also with down syndrome.  They shared a room, clothes and life experiences.  I'm sure in the three days since being notified that she had a brother coming for her, she had a lot of questions as to what that included. 

Looking at his picture before he arrived...
What make & model am I getting?

He's here! 

Giving the traditional (way too hard!) Albanian cheek pinch.



Not too sure about this...
Isaac: MOM! She pinched me and now she won't play ball! 
(she absolutely refused to play ball with him)


It's been 10 min. She is definitely not impressed. She wants a refund. 



Sibling jealousy hit hard and fast. The Sisters reported that Mila would cry every day when I would go back to Isaac in our little European apartment and she had to stay behind in the orphanage.  How do you explain such inequity to a tender heart?? All the photos in Albania had me strategically positioned between the two, making sure they both knew I was fully available to them; a practice I continued for over a year when we came home.  Despite that effort an early honeymoon phase, for nearly 15 months every time Isaac would enter the room, Mila would promptly go out the other side.  She clearly didn't sign up for this brother nonsense and was going to have absolutely nothing to do with him.  It broke my heart. 💔 What made it worse was how much Isaac adored his new big sister--he wanted nothing more than to please/annoy her every moment of the day.  Enter the COVID Shutdown.  24/7 of nothing but your mother & brother.  Not even Gramma was available to provide emotional respite. 

That's when it happened...she started staying in the room.  Then she started not rejecting him. Which lead to some engagement in play. Which lead to squabbles and laughter and togetherness. COVID was a backwards answer to prayer. 


Fast forward to 4 years of siblinghood. 







Within the miracle of adoption and all the pain that it entails, the joy that blossoms is all the more beautiful in these two faces. <3 

Sunday, May 8, 2022

Three Little Words

 There are miles of important dates in motherhood.  The day you find out about your child, the day they come home, their first smile, their first tooth, the first time they intentionally say 'I love you'.  

Isaac said his first 'I love you' the night before his 3rd birthday, November 19, 2013. 💖  His little lips struggled to make the sounds but it was clear as a bell. I.  Was.  A. Mess.


Today...Mother's Day, May 8, 2022, is the day forever marked as the day Mila initiated her first 'I love you' to me.  💝    Fresh from my own shower, dressed in a robe with a towel on my head, I popped into her room to make sure she was getting dressed.  She looked me straight in the eyes and said "You know what, Mommy?  Mila love you. Mila love Mommy. You!" as she wrapped her arms around me and gave me a big hug.   For nearly 4 years she had responded to my I Love Yous but never initiated her own.  Today was her day.  Today was OUR day.  I.  Was.  A.  Mess.  

 



Three little words: Are you hungry, Please be kind, Time for bed, You are safe, Try it again, Who did this, Get in the car, Pick that up, Not this time, Where's your shoe, Momma needs (a) break, That's good thinking, Let's clean up.  The vast majority of my day is three little words, but I love you is the one I aim to say the most.  The three little words I never want there to be any doubt about.  Three little words that they can speak on their own because they were loved first.  (1 John 4:19)

Sunday, April 10, 2022

A Much Needed Spring Break Getaway

With COVID restrictions relaxing and life becoming more and more safe for my kids, getting out of dodge had been more and more a priority.  The COVID life has had various layers of really-hard for my family, but since November I've had a particularly difficult season.  We had covid over the thanksgiving holiday which was concurrent with loosing all of my back office staff at the clinic.  Between making up for lost time while sick & school closures, the holidays and the significant increase in clinic demand during Christmas AND having no staff to support me during that time, my already notable work load nearly doubled--taking nursing triage calls during dinner and working until after 11pm had become the norm into January.  February brought significant medical visits for both kids leading to new medical issues that now need to be addressed and my mother found herself in the hospital for a week and needing nearly a month of rehab in her home thereafter. Not to mention the Seattle Winter Gray--uggg. It was A LOT.  I admit, I cried out more than once "Lord, this yoke is NOT easy. The next step in front of me has to be Yours". We needed to get out of town.  I needed to get out town.  

The criteria was set--Warm. I needed the sun and lots of it! No cooking. No cleaning. Somewhere we've never been. Pool for the kids.  Space for me to read after bedtime.  Everything else was negotiable.

Location: Phoenix.   

Day 1:

I can't say it enough. My kids are STELLAR travelers. Even after 3 years of being grounded, they stepped right into their frequent flyer shoes.  (Maybe when your first exposure to family life is a 5,300 mile flight to America, you are predestined to travel greatness??) Both kids also know that traveling is one of the two times that they have access to their tablets, and there is usually a surprise tucked away in their backpacks...which means momma gets to read uninterrupted on the plane.  #mommasnotstupid 






Turns out the Great State of Arizona has a fabulous drink called a Shirley Temple. It's because the drink is ONLY available in Arizona it became a daily poolside treat. Too bad Washington doesn't have them. *shoot*. We'll have to visit Arizona again someday. *wink*



Day 2:

When planning for our trip I stumbled upon a Expedia package deal that included a hotel at the River Ranch Waterpark. Oh my...this was incredible. We have been ruined for any other hotel pools!











Day 3:

Early morning swim in the 'normal' pool' followed by a drive to Tortilla Flats in the heart of the Superstition Mountains and a boat ride around Canyon Lake. 



Tonto National Forest...coming from the PNW, these "forests" were giving me a good giggle. 




Prickly pear lemonade:


The Dolly Steamboat on Canyon Lake:













Day 4:

Gramma joined us for the last half of the trip.  I love that my kids are filling their memory tanks with special Gramma times (that is something that I did not have as a child).  


 Isaac literally threw a ball back and forth in the pool for a hour.  Mila had a big win in the pool--she never learned how to breathe & drink at the same time (something that is learned through safe feeding as a infant); getting her face wet in the shower or pool is a big anxiety producing event for her.  I hadn't found a way to help her take those first steps toward swimming independently by blowing bubbles in the water, UNTIL I accidently threw a ball in her direction, it splashed her in the face and she was willing to throw it back to me.  It was an ah-ha moment.  I spent the next 45 min accidently-on purpose throwing the ball so it splashed her in the face and she didn't complain (or choke) once.  POOLSIDE WIN!









We adventured up the South Mountain to Dobbins Lookout for a panoramic view of the Phoenix area. Flaaat-pile of rocks!-flaaat-pile of rocks!  is the best way I know to describe the jarring landscape.  











Massive win for me in the evenings: I left my work phone and laptop behind, gracefully asked my staff to not call me, took social media off my phone and brought a 450page book, which I read cover to cover.  A real live get away. 

Day 5:

An early morning visit to the Botanical Gardens before the real heat kicked in.  Both kids were interested in taking their own photos. Despite 315 deleted photos later, they actually found some really great shots!















*****









More pool time. The lazy river has become our #1 favorite spot.  At one point, around one of our many turns around the river, the kids were peacefully floating in their tubes, I was walking slowing in the water between them, the sun was warm and perfect, we were surrounded by the fragrance of jasmine and chirps of doves, quails and grackles and despite traumatically breaking my toe in the lazy river (don't ask), I thought THIS. This is perfect.  Sensory heaven. 








Day 6:

A last dip in the pool before packing up and grabbing lunch with some local friends.  They recommended their favorite gelato place, which did not disappoint!  




On the hottest day of our trip (nearly 100) we swung by Arizona Falls before heading to the airport for our now delayed late flight. 








1145pm.  Woody is officially done with traveling.  



We collapsed into our own beds at 0100, sun kissed, relaxed and ready to add many more lazy rivers to our travel list.