Who Am I? (Albanian Intermission Day 23)

My sophomore year of college I was apart of Campus Christian Fellowship (CCF)--it was basically college youth group and I loved it. It was EXACTLY what I needed during an otherwise very overwhelming year.  One weekend a special guest speaker presented on the Nature of God based on Moses's experience with Yahweh in Exodus 34:6. WHO is God?  Simple enough question right??  No joke, it was a life changing weekend for me!  I had been a Christian for 3/4 of my young life at that point. I felt confident in what God had done for me, why He had done it, and how I could choose to respond. But WHO is God apparently hadn't crossed my mind.  Learning God's name, WHO He is, drastically altered my relationship with Him and I would dare say  who I know myself to be in Him. I am confident that seed planted in college directly impacted my time in Albania 22 years later. (Thank you CCF for your ministry!)

  

Through every road block on this crazy adoption road, every apparent setback, attack and ridiculous inconvenience I found myself on my knees asking for wisdom, clarity and explanation. Through it all, all I ever heard was: "WHO AM I?  Desiree, look at Me. WHO AM I?"  Over and over again I'd repeat: You are good. You are merciful. You are gracious. You are slow to anger. You are abounding in steadfast love. You are faithful. You are unchanging. You are God. 

• The Catholic church in Albania sought to block the adoption:  Look at Me. WHO AM I?
• The courts added a three week unexplained delay to our case: Don't look anywhere except to Me. WHO AM I?
• The judge demanded a ridiculous detail that required police involvement: Look at ME. WHO AM I?
• A lawyer had to be secured to protect my soon-to-be child from a potentially corrupt judge: Say it again--WHO AM I? 
• I had to return my adolescent child to an institution for developmentally & intellectually delayed adults with no return date: ME. Look. At. Me. WHO AM I?

Over and over and over again. Not as a feel-good mantra but as a declaration in response to His call:  "I've called you out upon the water, you can't pay attention to the wind and the waves. You have to know WHO I AM if you are going to stay upright. Look right to Me. Who do you know Me to be? Who am I?"

You are good. You are merciful. You are gracious. You are slow to anger. You are abounding in steadfast love. You are faithful. You are unchanging. You are God. 

Who does that make you, Desiree?

I am a child of God. (Gal 3:26)

I am safe in your calling (Is 43:1)

My family is protected in the shadow of your wing. (Ps 17:8)

Your character and Your plan does not change because of the circumstances around me have. (Jer 29:11)

This is the TRUTH we are holding on to as we wait...it doesn't matter what is going on around us: 

I KNOW who He is.