52 Weeks of Family: Week 11

Mila:

New Years came and went without a peep.   We had a visit with our missionary friends from Albania who are home for the holidays. You absolutely shrieked with excitement to see familiar faces and to show off your room and your things. Our friends were shocked to see how much you already have changed and the blend of English & Albanian you use every day. They've known you nearly your entire life. It makes my heart happy to know that you will have a continued connection with them, even if just once a year. 

Your first (short) week of school was AWESOME!  You have seriously blown everyone out of the water. On day two you boldly declared "Mommy, no come back. Bye"  Even when I picked you up on Friday you wouldn't leave the classroom until I reassured you exactly when you got to come back. You've spent the last 8 years in a bustling institution full of residents, caregivers, volunteers and Sisters. I know being in the quiet of our family of three has been difficult. I am so glad that school is offering you the social input that you crave.  I pray that real and deep friendships are forged for you.

We've been working hard on your kitchen-phobia. Well, not you...I've been sneaking in play therapy and luring you into the kitchen by playing Let It Go while you weren't looking (bwaaaaaaaaa).  It's not evil, truly. I'm desperate to give you felt safety in this space. You are welcome here. There are no requirements of you. Someday you'll feel empowered enough to tell me when you are hungry and leave all the pantry doors open while you search for your craving.  You ARE enjoying pretend cooking your favorite Albanian foods with play-dough. That is a HUGE first step.  I didn't think it would work, but I piggy-backed on your school excitement by asking you to help make your lunch...that was AMAZING. You were so excited to choose between a banana & and orange, between yogurt & applesauce. You even held onto the cutting board while I made your sandwich!  WHAT?? You literally shook when placing your lunch bag inside the fridge, from fear or excitement I don't know, but you did it!!! 

Isaac:

You were so happy to go back to school this week. You love your friends and teachers and learning. Your teacher said "boy, he was an especially happy kid this week!" I love that both you and your sister love school and are thriving. You have a new friend at lunch; an older boy with Down syndrome. Rumor is you two have your own language and have a great time at lunch recess together. I love this! We work so hard to make sure that you are included in the typical world with typical friends, but I am sure it is relaxing to hang out with a buddy that 'gets it'; no extra work required. We'll have to see if he would like to come over and play one day. 

With all of Mila's firsts it's easy to gloss over the new things you are doing too.  You did something for the absolute first time this week---you asked to play with a toy you couldn't see. This may sound so very small, but it's been a missing piece of your play and imagination. I first had to teach you to play, then we worked through parallel play to interactive play to imaginative play. But even now your imaginative play is mimicry--doing (and fully enjoying!) what you have seen me do.  Or, responding to a choice of toys that I present to you.  BUT, this week you not only initiated wanting to play, you asked for your stacking cups that were no where to be seen nor had they been. It blew my mind!  That is such a HUGE developmental jump. I'm so proud of you, buddy. Keep growing!    (Also, if anyone needs a fantastic toy idea, mini red solo cups from the dollar store is the way to go!)

Me:

In attempting to anticipate what life would be like once Mila came home you emotionally prepared for the absolutely worse case scenario--all adoption trauma hell to break loose. You were prepared for all the nightmare scenarios that can happen with adoption, especially older child adoption. Praise the Lord, none of those have been the case!  I think the relative ease of the last 11 weeks has been the Lord's hand over your SUPER LOW expectations. The carrot in front of you should a trauma-apocalypse happen was tickets for your little family to see the Broadway production of The Lion King in Seattle. Remember, you literally thought "if we are going through hell, it'll be a nice break for me, who cares if one of them is screaming for 3 hours; if things are going well, it will be a good celebration".  Hallelujah, it was indeed a celebration!  A first time offering of a sensory-friendly production allowed us to stretch our emotional & sensory legs a bit and everyone had a GREAT time.  What an incredible opportunity to immerse your kiddos in the arts and let their right-brains go free.  Musical theater is definitely in Isaac's blood; looks like Mila is going to be a theater geek too!  She was whooping & hollering at the end like a die-hard fan girl!