Day 4 - Gotchya Day

I have no words...

Meeting

Smiley Boy

Laughing

Almost walking

Hi there!

Family

Day 3 - Beijing

Day three in China.  It's still hard to believe that we are actually here.  We are all still in a strange state of jet lag & disbelief.  I konked out at 7:30 last night, but was wide awake at 3:30am thinking...I'm in Little One's time zone!  For nine months I've gone to bed praying over his nap time & woken up praying over his sleep.  Now I wake up when he wakes up! It's still all a miracle to me. 

     Today, we visited Tiananmen Square. We've all seen the footage from 1989...we were told specifically today that while our guide will take questions privately we were NOT to talk about that day publicly, nor would the government acknowledge that it occurred.  We walked through this place steeped in history & courage and I was so very thankful for my country.  I'm proud of America's ideals and hopes and freedoms.  I'm excited that Little One will have the life and freedom that he would not have here. 

     Just to the north of the square is the Forbidden City.  Oh. My. Goodness.  What an experience that is. I don't know how to do it justice in words or in photos, but I will say this...the China pavilion at Epcot is no where close!  The visit there was amazing...with 1.3 billion of our closest Chinese friends. 

    We also visited a traditional Beijing neighborhood via rickshaw.  Mom was particularly moved by this experience. It was a view into what Little One and his people have experienced for centuries.  Jess got great video of the rickshaw 'event' *smile*.  I haven't figured  out yet how to download that here, but I will...

     This evening we met with our adoption representative.  What a sweet, sweet woman. Over 20 years working with families to bring their children home. One of her return babies (now 6 years old) is on this trip with us to pick up her baby brother.  :)  In a touching moment...that crushed me into a crying mess...she noted that the Chinese Government Adoption Agency said specifically that whomever was adopting Little One "must be extra special to seek out a child like him."  What do you say to that?!  The Lord's plan for Little One has ALWAYS been for good.  His little body was formed perfectly with an extra chromosome of Love.  And that I was chosen to be his forever mommy is a perfect gift that comes straight from Heaven.

   So tomorrow morning (Sunday) we three fly to Guizhou Province and Little One is scheduled to be placed in my arms at 5pm China Time.  Finally...Gotchya Day!

  

No pictures today as I'm having trouble downloading, but there will be TONS tomorrow...most of me crying so be prepared.

Day 2 - Beijing

Today was a packed day!  I think purposely the adoption agency scheduled a busy first day to get us on to China time...I think. :)  Six families arrived from all over the US yesterday, all with the same passionate call to adopt. All itching to get their hands on their kids!  Between our running around to cultural sights today, I enjoyed chatting with them on the bus and during meals. Its great fun to share stories and hear that their stories is also mine...almost word for word. We interrupted each other to share photos, talk about our individual social workers, and gush over how much we already love our kids.  Little One & I will always have these families (& those still to arrive) who shared our special story of God weaving us together.



     Here are a couple  photos from our day. We started at a Cloissen Factory watching artists form copper art & inlay with gorgeous enamel color. This used to be an art form limited to the Imperial Palace that now the general public can enjoy.  We  also visited a jade factory and was very impressed with the artistry of this precious stone. 



Jade Ball of Happiness

 

Little One at Olympic Park



A quick visit at the Beijing 2008 Olympic Park ended our day, but the biggest event was the Great Wall of China...for two reasons.  First, it's amazing that this hunk of stone was built over 200 years with a single intention of protection. It really is impressive.  Second, because it turns out when you mix jet lag & 100 degree heat...Desiree gets heat stroke.  This was a first for me, and frankly a little scary as I ended up face down on The Great Wall of China attempting to cool myself on the stones and trying not to vomit.  It was not a particularly fun 30minutes in the dirt (although, Flat Ange was an awesome fan!), but I'm hoping that this was our token illness for the trip and life can go on.  Thankfully, several hours, much fluid and many prayers later I am feeling much better.  Hallelujah!

   Please continue to pray for health & protection.  Over us & Little One.  I heard today that he may have already been transitioned away from his foster family to 'ease' his transition to me.  I'm not sure how I feel about that practice, but I pray that his little heart is covered and that his transition is healthy.

     Tomorrow we see a few more sites around Beijing and meet with our adoption agency representative as each family prepares to fly to their children on Sunday!

 



Little One on the Wall



Great Wall

 

Day 1 - Travel

Well...we are in China!  I'm still having a hard time wrapping my brain around this concept, but the view from the hotel confirms it. We are not in Washington anymore! 

Our flight from Seattle was uneventfully short.  We were a little shocked to find out that the flight was only 11 & 1/2 hours and not 18+. To be honest...it kind of threw off my sleep on the plane-game and we ended up awake for the entire flight.  No complaints though.  Former Washington State Governor and current Obama White House administrator Gary Locke was on the plane and helped keep conversation lively around the baggage claim.

Hopefully, we've had our one glitch for the trip.  Mom's bag was "purposely" left behind in Seattle by the airlines and will be arriving sometime tomorrow evening.  The Beijing airport already had her name on the "Property Irregularity Report" when we arrived.  It's good to know there was some good communication between the nations.

Tonight/today/yesterday...whatever day it is, we sleep.  Tomorrow we get to know the other families bringing their kiddos home and will visit a few hot spots in the area.  Turns out there is a big wall around here somewhere!

 

444 Days Later

     We are boarding the plane to China today...let me retype that, just for my own gratification...WE ARE BOARDING THE PLANE TO CHINA TODAY!!! 

     What a journey this has been! I will admit more than once, mostly in the depths of The Wait, I mumbled (you know, so God couldn't hear) "there is NO way I'm doing this again".  The process was hard.  There is no getting around saying that.  Just plain hard--emotionally, financially, spiritually, physically hard. I suppose the grace lays in knowing that the Lord protected me by NOT giving me the specifics of the journey when it was started.  In fact, He told me specifically (day one actually) "Don't look further than I have lead you".  (Yikes, was He was right on that one!).  And now...exactly 444 days later, this portion of the journey is complete.  Wow!  And the next portion is JUST beginning! I wonder what the next 444 days will bring? You can look for that post on October 25, 2013.  :)

     Until then, would you mind praying for the following things, especially during our time in China:

• Travel protection & safety. For us as travelers and over our baggage.
• Physical health & protection. 
• Cultural sensitivity as we interact personally with multiple layers of government representing both China & the USA.
• Protection over Little One's heart, as his world is about to be turned up side down.  This white family with the blue eyes is taking him away from all he has ever know. He will grieve---he needs to grieve, but I pray for the Healing to come quickly.
• Wisdom for me to be the mommy that Little One needs right now. That I will interpret his needs appropriately and be able to provide for him.
• For a quick & healthy attachment between Little One & I. I've been praying that on his heart & mine is already written the language & personality that our relationship will have.
• Physical peace over Little One. His food, language & climate are changing...all perfect ground for physical illness. Please pray for health!
• Peace during our return flights home. And a miraculous passing of time!
• Jet lag mercy!  I am a terrible victim of jet lag. International travel usually leaves me crippled for a solid ten days. Between his adoption shock & mine, there can be no room for the physical affects of jet lag.
• Grace over finances as we complete this official process
• Joy.  That there would be an overwhelming & tangible sense of the Lord's joy. :)
• Most importantly, that this new little family will be a living testimony to God's amazing love.  He went to the ends of the earth to find us lost & broken and is returning with a home prepared for us. What an amazing gift of Life!

As I noted before, I hope to send a daily update with photos. Until then, thank you for your prayers and support!!

My Traveling Partners

I have the joy of having two...and a half...wonderful people coming with me to China to pick up Little One.  They are all special women in my life and we've all traveled internationally together in different combinations so I am particularly excited to get us all on the same plane.

My mom, Audrey:  (I like this story...). My mother & I were sitting next to each other in church one Sunday. During meet-n-greet I turned around to the person behind me, introduced myself and then my mom as "the woman who delivered me". (I thought it was pretty clever).  The lovely lady turned to my mom and declared, "Oh, I didn't know you were a labor & delivery nurse!"  (HAHAHA. That cracks me up every time!)  One of the first statements my mom made when I started down the adoption road was "you know, I'm going with you right?!" Well, I do now!  :) One of her best friends recently told me 'a pack of wild horses couldn't keep your mother away from China' and that made me laugh...cuz it's totally true!  She delivered me and now she'll be there as my son is delivered TO me.  It's the way it should be.

Me & Mom

My friend, Jessie: Jessie, her husband Kris, and I were on a missions trip together to Papua New Guinea 7 years ago.  I'll spare you the details, but when you are a) on a plane for 36hours together, and b) land in country with an average temperature equal to that of the sun AND there is no plumbing...you get to know each other well. Very. Very. Well. *wink*   I was in the delivery room for the birth of both of Kris & Jessie's kids and they have been HUGE encouragers during the peaks & valleys of this journey.  This is the call I got two months ago:

ME:  Hello?

Jess: Hey, it's me.  Kris & I have been praying about this and well, you were there to bring our kids into the family, we want to be there to bring yours into the family.  I think I'm supposed to go to China with you!

ME: *tears STREAMING*  Oh my gosh?! What?! Are you joking me? Really?!

Jess: I just have to believe that God will provide the money, but while praying, the Lord said I wasn't to worry about it. So...

ME: Jess...the Lord told me I was supposed to fund raise for travel for THREE adults.  The money has already been raised.  You're going to China!

Jess: *tears* *squealing* We're going to CHINA!

Isn't God awesome?

Jessie, Team Photographer

My BFF, Ange...kind of (the traveling part, not the BFF part):  Ange & I live exactly 1551miles away from each other and have most of our lives, so we've had to get creative with this particular long distance relationship. How we survived life without skype & unlimited minutes & texts, I'll never know (Right about now both our moms are rolling their eyes at the thought of their long distance phone bills of years past).  When Ange's daughter was born 4 & 1/2 years ago, sadly I couldn't be in Minnesota for the delivery...so Flat Des went instead!  She helped during labor & was there to kiss the sweet face of my surprise namesake. 

Although, I would have given my left eye to have Ange with me in China, the timing didn't work out for her to be away from her young family for two weeks.  So...Flat Ange is going instead! 

Prepared for anything!

That's Team China. Three seats going, FOUR seats coming home!

How I am Feeling...

I'm going to jot down a few thoughts on how I am feeling for two reasons:
1. This week is going by so stinking fast
2. I don't want to forget these last weeks at all!

     I will admit that through May, June and half of July I was a bit of a mess.  I knew The Wait had taken it's toll...a bleeding ulcer & ten new pounds were good indicators, but as anxiety is generally not my default emotion I really didn't know what to do to 'make it better'.  About three & half weeks ago, in the thick of will-we-make-the-August-travel-window!?-worry, I was listening to the new Matt Redman CD 10,000 Reasons on the way to work, singing as loud as I could in the rolling music studio that is my Jeep. I've sung along to tracks 5 & 6 a hundred times, but for whatever reason (ahem...the Holy Spirit), I finally heard the words:

...And we're waiting

Waiting on You God

And our hearts will Trust

Trust in who You are

God, who keeps our fires burning

Burning through the darkest night

See the hope in our hearts

The faith in our eyes

You can move the highest mountain

You can keep our dreams alive

You're the joy of our hearts

And you're the fire in our eyes...

(Fires, Matt Redman, 2011)

...Standing on this mountain top

Looking just how far we've come

Knowing that for every step

You were with us

Kneeling on this battleground

Seeing just how much You've done

Knowing every victory was Your power in us

Scars & struggles on the way

But with joy our hearts can say

Yes, our hearts can say

Never one did we ever walk alone

Never once did You leave us on our own

You are faithful

God, You are faithful...

(Never Once, Matt Redman, 2011)

     Right there in the car, the anxiety left & the peace came. It was...and continues to be a confident peace that hums "We're good. He's got this."  Now, I didn't supernaturally KNOW that we'd make the August travel window (I'm still in awe over that one),  but there was this strange organization that fell into place. The bank had my exchanged money ready; my hectic work schedule trickled down to a low roar; I crossed off the last my list of things to get done before Little One comes home.  All without any effort, it all "just fell into place" over the last two weeks.  And then I got The Call. :) 

     These last few days have been peaceful, unrushed and frankly, enjoyable. Friends are stopping by to watch the Olympics, I have the time to chat, send out messages, work in the garden, spend time with my niece & nephew, and enjoy the summer that has finally arrived in Seattle. It's joyful & peaceful.  I wish there was a different English word for that supernatural peace...I want to package it up as a remembrance stone to keep in my pocket.  I want to know it so well that I don't have to seek it out, but recognize it as a gift freely given and readily available. I'm about to be the single working mother of a jet lagged, Mandarin speaking, 20month old boy who rocks an extra chromosome...I'm going to NEED that supernatural peace!  :)  (Little One's about to be the son of a jet-lagged, English speaking working mother who sings operettas in the car...HE'S going to need that supernatural peace!)

Philippians 4:7

The Message (MSG)

^6-7Don't fret or worry. Instead of worrying, pray. Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers, letting God know your concerns. Before you know it, a sense of God's wholeness, everything coming together for good, will come and settle you down. It's wonderful what happens when Christ displaces worry at the center of your life.

Does anyone know Matt Redman, by the way?  I'd like him to change the name of his CD to "Desiree's Adoption Anthem...in Jeep minor". 

Preparing to come home...

I think the next few posts are going to be in backwards order.  I give myself permission to do things backwards...because I'm going to China to pick up my son!  (oh my gosh, that phrase is so surreal & perfect at the same time!)

I'm so excited to get Little One in my arms; to find out his qwerks, his smiles, his sleeping noises, how to comfort him when he is scared, to speak God's love over him.  I honestly don't know how to wrap my brain around the 20hour flight back.  And I'm nervous about recovering from jet lag once we are home. When we are HOME...that is when the real journey begins.

Of course, everyone is excited to see this boy!  Many people have enthusiastically asked when they can visit and how they can help. Both very good questions. The answers are: I don't know and I'll keep you posted.  :)  Little One and I will need to be on lock down for several weeks once we are home.  We have a lot of time to make-up in the attachment arena.  We haven't had 9months to grow together and the intimacy of infancy for him to trust me.  Our first weeks will be recovering from jet lag & travel illnesses, learning the basics about each other, tackling language barriers, and finding some sort of ISH to a daily routine.  Couple that with multiple medical appointments, blood draws, shots and 5,000 other firsts...we are basically going to be in survival mode. Until I know that we've both semi-recovered from adoption shock, we may not have any visitors...but that doesn't mean we don't want you to be apart of our lives!  We are just going to need time.  Something we haven't had yet together...

A fellow adoptive family posted two articles on their blog for their friends, family & supporters.  Both are excellent & truthful insights on how 'the team' can support a new family through adoption transition.  I was touched when I read them.  Although, they are not in my words, I would encourage you to reflect on them the same way.  I love Jen Hatmaker's list of how to support a family "after the airport".  (She is a great author and funny lady!). And the Battle article is a fantastic reminder of the continued need for prayer.  As hard as The Wait has been, getting Little One home is going to have been easy compared to what is ahead. I value your continued practical and prayer support.   

How To Be The Village
The Battle for Adoptive Families

Can you say...China?!

I can, as of 6:43 this morning...cuz I'll be there in 7 days!!!!!!

     I don't even know where to start.  I got the message at 6:43 this morning. Ran around the house crying & screaming. Called my mom. Hopped in the shower...forgot to wash my hair and only shaved one leg. Called my best friend while still wrapped in a towel (too much info, sorry. still too excited to edit). Cried & screamed some more.   Called my good friend. Called my little brother. Called my sister-in-law. Lots of crying & screaming. Got to work late...mostly because of the shower incident above. Struggled to get ANYTHING accomplished in the first 4 hours, because of the crying & the screaming & the barrage of confirmatory emails & the only one shaved leg (totally distracting by the way).  With all of that...here is what we know:

• God miraculously pushed the last piece of paperwork through the Chinese government in 7days, rather than the 2-4 weeks it was supposed to take.  (Praise you Lord. You move mountains!)
• Because of the quick turn around, we not only made the August travel window, we got the appointment at the US Consulate confirmed AND we get to travel with other Bethany families.
•  We'll be leaving Seattle Wednesday August 8th arriving in Beijing on the 9th.  Little One should be in my arms by the 13th. (Two weeks, honey. Just two more weeks!)
• We'll be in various parts of China for two weeks completing paperwork, attending VISA appointments, getting medical checks, poking my eye out with chopsticks, etc, arriving back home August 22nd.
• My God is a faithful, patient & loving Father who has ordained every step of this adoption road...and the journey is just starting.

     Internet access will be hit & miss while in China. I've made secondary arrangements for updates primarily through the blog. If you haven't already, or if you know someone who wants to receive updates, please make sure you check the right side of the blog to sign up for email updates.

     Time for more crying & screaming...



Last Update from China...?

I got an unexpected surprise today. 

An update email from China...with a photo of my Little One:

How stinking cute is he?!?!



     Four more photos and...as strange as it is to say...hopefully, the last update I will receive from my boy's foster family.  The FINAL piece of paperwork was released by the US Consulate last week and sent back to the Chinese authorities to issue the official Travel Invitation. It is my prayer that that little piece of paper is directed to the right hands QUICKLY so we can fly during the small open travel window in August.  (Please feel free to join in prayer!).  Until that time, I get to pour over the 12 photos I have of my little guy and see how he has grown.  One year has passed from the first photo to the most recent and I can see that he has been well cared for, hopefully well loved, and most certainly covered prayer...soon to be covered in smooches!  I'll see you SOON buddy, I promise.

9months old:
Rocking the pick pantaloons

16 months:
Trying a new haircut

20 months old:
Hi Mom!

Not Alone

     It's been a quite week...I've been reading up on China and attempting to internalize the culture that my son will always be a part of. Being a European girl myself, the clash of cultures is significant, but I'm learning A LOT...I just make NO promises in the chopstick arena. (I might actually poke my eye out).

     I learned today that along with Little One’s visa, passport, adoption certificates and health records, we will also be coming home with his "Abandonment Certificate". Ouch! Oh, that crushes me.  Forever on this earth there will be an official document declaring MY child, who has SO MANY people waiting for him to come home, as having been abandoned. I hadn’t given much thought to the moments or hours that my sweet boy was placed alone by his birth parents to be found by another. Was he cold? Did he cry? Was he hungry? How many passed him by before he was discovered? Whatever the situation, it must have been awful!! Then the Lord reminded me…”I will never leave or forsake you”; “When you cry, I will hear your call”; “You are surrounded by my angels” and then, “Desirée, Little One was never alone, I was with him”. Oh, what comfort to my heart!!  Thank you Lord for your gentle and protective hand!  You were there when Little One was being formed in his birth mother’s womb.  You knit him together perfectly with an extra chromosome of Your perfect love. You were there in the chaos of his ‘abandonment’.  You kept the wicked away from him & You were there to guide the right person to find my Little One. There was no place in which You were not a part of upholding Little One’s future.  In fact, You are there now in his laying down for naps, his crawling on the floor & in his first steps.  You are with him now, even though I am not, writing Your law on his heart; and You will remain with US as we seek You to lead our little family. Thank you, Lord for we are NOT abandoned.  We are FOUND perfectly in You.

The Nursery...

     Nurseries are fun.  A place to design & dream & hope...but let's be honest: the kid don't care. Nurseries are for the moms. Yeah baby!

     My best friend lives two thousand miles away, but we talk nearly every day so I it was through THE NURSERY that I 'surprised' her with the news of the adoption.

ME: Hey there.  When you come out next month, do you mind if we take a day to just putz around the house? I need help with a project or two.

BFF: Sure. Whatchya thinking?

ME: Can you help me decide where to put the crib...?
BFF: The crib?! What?! You're going to do it? You're going to do it!!

There was laughter & tears & lots of squealing, and her husband rolling his eyes...he, apparently doesn't "get" us.  (Love ya Scott!).   I emailed her a picture of what I had in mind within nanoseconds of our conversation and we declared "Let the nursery planning commence!"

     Sadly, I didn't take very many "before" pictures.  Below is the photo I had to send to the adoption agency proving that I didn't have a room full of knives waiting for my child.  You can see it was a semi-functional spare room, but that was about it...and no knives.

     This is the dresser I stole from my mother's guest room (don't tell).

   My good friend Jessie stepped in for the BFF to help with the crib.

  And...that would be me balancing the crib on my face while Jess ran to get our friend...the professional photographer at the front door.  She didn't even bother to say hello before she snapped this glamour shot! *wink*

And now the final product...

The letter wall--WAY fun to put together!

Dresser--after. I'm proud of how this turned out.

The bedding.

It's surprisingly hard to find teddy bear bedding for a boy. Who knew?!

I think we'll spend a lot of time here.

Decorations made for the baby shower by my sweet friends.

A bed to grow into.
(and probably the one I'll inhabit for the first few weeks)

Little One's baby pictures!

Because every boy needs a 6 foot bear.
(Probably not the bear's permanent home as the two year old cousin has declared it 'scahwee' during trial run nap times in the nursery)

     I've grown fond of Jesus's message of hope that He has gone to prepare a place for us (John 14:3). I wonder if MY room has red accents & the faint hint of jasmin? But, I suppose He knows what I like better than I do! I hope you like blues & browns & teddy bears, Little One.  Your room is ready...I'm coming to get you soon!

Almost there...

    For the last three weeks I've been waiting for one single piece of paper from the United States Department of State National Visa Center confirming that the U.S. approves that China approves that the U.S. approves this adoption. Everyday for the last three weeks I've rushed home for lunch to check the mail...and it hasn't been there.  I spent 25minutes on hold earlier this week attempting to track this piece of paper down, only to be  reminded (not so nicely) that "snail mail takes longer than electronic mail, ma'am so you'll just have to be patient". Oh, really? Really?!  Do you really want to talk to me about being patient, lady? Have you ever dragged your heart through 19 layers of bureaucracy in TWO countries only to be told snail mail is slow...from New Hampshire...really?! I mean...I appreciate your time, ma'am. Thank you for your service to our country. (Weirdo).

    Thankfully, today that little piece of paper finally arrived.  Hallelujah!

Finally!



Here are the steps that still need to take place as I understand them:

• This letter is sent with stack of other papers to the US Consultate in China.
• The US Consulate in China approves that the U.S. approves that China approves that the U.S. approves the adoption (that makes me dizzy!)
• An Article 5 is approved and sent to the Chinese Adopton Affairs office in China (not sure what that is, but it sounds important enough not to mock it)
• China reviews (up to 2-3 weeks) and issues the official travel invitation.
• With the travel invitation, I can schedule an appointment with the US Consulate in China.
• Once that appointment is confirmed...I can book tickets!

Because of the delay in getting the above Visa paperwork, I missed the window to travel in July (sadness!) But if the calendar math works out right, I should easily make the August group (the adoption agency has prescheduled windows for adoptive familes to travel together). A happy result of the delay is that my maternity leave was modified to be able to have 8 weeks of full leave and then work just part time through the end of the year (while getting paid full time!). That will save on the cost of daycare and be an excellent transition time for Little One & I as we attach to eachother and address any medical/developmental needs that he may have. It is an alternative that never would have opened if I would have been on the plane next week as I had hoped. So, I suppose God's timing IS perfect... even if the National Visa Center lady is a psycho...I mean a beloved child of God.